Monday, June 29, 2009

Just Living.....

WOW! That about sums it up. What a week!
I was thrilled to be back at work today. Sounds nuts, huh? I have to give a huge shout out to all of the ICU nurses and doctors and folks on the Funeral Home Staff. You peeps are some special folks. I don't know how ya'll do it. I just know I couldn't do it. If I was called "crude" once this week, I was called it 100 times (Thanks ASHLEY!). I don't have the verbal calmness to work in either of those professions, but I thank God for you all.
Aunt Beth was layed to rest yesterday afternoon right beside her son Jonathon and just below her father. She's in a good place now. My Grandmother hasn't gotten out of bed yet. I don't blame her. I'm exhausted!! I can't imagine going through all of that at 72 much less it being my daughter. Please keep her in your prayers for as long as you remember. I told her so many times that I wished I could just take all of her pain and just never even tell her about it. I would have done that for her. That's how heartbreaking it was to watch what she had to go through. It's that way for any parent, I'm sure. It hurts to think about.
ONWARD, to other things........
We are officially under contract on our new home. I'M SO EXCITED!! If I wasn't so worn out, I'd go get the pictures out of my truck and share them. I can't. Please forgive me one more night. I'm getting back in the swing of things and even knew what day of the week it was MOST of today. HA. I promise I'll get the pics up. Don't be too harsh. You have to see this venture with a VERY creative eye. You also have to realize how badly Jeff and I want a SMALLER home. WE HATE THE BIG HOUSE THING. If you have a big house, power to you. It didn't work for me. Hindsight is such a blessing. I can't wait to all be back on one floor with no room for mess and chaos. Oh, how I miss the days of being able to clean my whole house in one day!! We are going to start tearing out walls and plumbing and cabinets in a few days. I've been picking out paint colors today. Think....chocolate brown furniture with white wainscoting and lime green....a little brown and cream zebra action and some accessories with oranges and reds and a little blue. OH YEAH, I'm excited. I'm trying to find a really bold retro print wallpaper for a focal wall. If you've seen anything that you love love lately, let me know. There just aren't enough hours in the day when it comes to this kind of stuff. I love it!! Now that I have a space, I'm ready to start making it MINE. I'm ready to smack my FLAVA all over it.
It's OFF with the hair tomorrow. I've tried this growing out thing and I hate it. I haven't cut it the last few months because I was always told that short hair made you look fat. WELL, I'm over it. Fat makes you look fat. Short hair is short hair and I'm ready to have mine back. I just don't have time for the flat iron and all this business, not to mention I'm gray as a goose and tired of giving half my paycheck to have it colored not to mention the 2 and half hours it takes. I'm over it. I'm ready for funk and fun and crazy. I don't know how professional a Mohawk will be, but I guess we'll try it out.
I'm out to catch some ZZZ's. I've got to start clearing out around here and figuring out how to get 7000 square feet to fit back into 1800. (What's that about a square peg in a round hole???) I only have until the end of JULY.

P.S. It feels good to be back. Thanks for all of your thoughts and your kind notes. Jama, I had no idea you were out there. I miss you and everyone asked about you at the reunion. I hope you are well. Oh and Melanie, I would never tell someone paying me a compliment to "kiss my ass". I'm blunt, not stupid. Thanks for your kind words.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

I am so sorry for my absence and I thank all of you fellow blog friends for checking on me.

I thought I was completely overwhelmed with trying to find a new home at the end of last week. Every time we found something, it was suddenly gone. Well, that happened twice and trust me when you are trying to decide where your family is going to live and your children are going to go to school and you have a timeline in which to do it, twice is too many. Twice is WAY too many times to have made that decision only to have it ripped away. So we spent ALL day Saturday torturing the children and making them look at houses. We finally decided on 5 acres out in the county with my third choice of school districts. I was just too overwhelmed with all of the decisions and trying to make them ok with myself to post. I didn't even know where I was so I had NO idea how to put in words yet....

Sunday morning we had some Father's Day festivities and headed out for breakfast and back over to the lot to take some pictures and see how we felt about it on another day. Let me interject and say Jeff has to be THE BEST FATHER EVER. I owe him a post and I swear I will get to it. I wish the tears rolling onto my shirt right now could just be automatically transformed into words but it doesn't work that way for me. I have to think hard on these things and my reserves are depleted right now. AND, by the way, he got the new Birkenstock sandals he wanted this year instead of a farm animal :) I'm still not sure which he liked better. When we were heading home from the lot (I'm not calling it a house even though one is there. It is a tiny 1100 square foot modular home that we could land in, but turning around would be difficult.) I got a phone call that has made me dig deep. My Aunt Beth, my mom's little sister, was found unresponsive at her house Sunday around noon. I got to the hospital about 1:30 and she has not woken up. She is on life support and has minimal brain activity. Yesterday we spoke with the Transplant Team, as that was her wish, and are having an EEG repeated this morning to confirm her brain activity when she is off of all of all of the seizure meds they had to give her. She began having seizures upon arrival at the hospital that took hours to control.

I've been thinking over the last few days as I have hardly left the hospital about all of the hard things I've dealt with before. I think this may be the hardest physical thing I've been through. As hard as it is for me, it doesn't compare to what my Grandmother is feeling. I have found a happy emotional place already. While it is hard to think about losing her, I have so many wonderful memories of my Aunt Beth. When I was 11 years old she sat and prayed with me and helped me give my life to Christ. I've been thinking the past few days that that may have been the BEST thing that ever happened to me. On any other day, if I had been asked, I probably would have said it was the birth of my children or something like that. I've come to realize though, that none of those things may have happened if it hadn't been for that day. It was my Aunt Beth that got me there. She taught me and she took me to church and she lead me when I asked her for help. What an AWESOME feeling she must have had to know she did that for me. What an AWESOME memory she gave me and an incredible eternal life. I know I will see her again. We believe that today will be our last day with her and feel blessed to have this time to tell her goodbye.

Of course, we are your typical dysfunctional family and mess is flying around us constantly. Please keep us in your prayers as we try to deal with everything on our plates. She has a son who is hurting deeply and again, my Grandmother.

We ALL need your prayers. Jeff is at work trying to figure out how to buy a house that doesn't have a kitchen. Yesterday, I was at the hospital and our realtor called and said the owner of the second house we made an offer on, which was the "perfect school, perfect location, but MUCH work house" had come back and asked if we were still interested. Jeff is working to get that figured out and Dalton has a horrible ear infection and is running a fever. He is so miserable he just cries. As a mom, you just want your own ear to hurt. He can't sleep. MISERABLE is the best word I know and I feel guilty for not being at home with him and guilty for not being at the hospital with my Grandmother. I'm at home now and about to shower to head back to the hospital.



Tuesday, June 16, 2009

59 Days and Counting

As of today, we officially have 59 days to find a new house, buy it and move!! Sound Fun? If you answered yes, please send me whatever you are smoking!! HA. I spent the day looking AGAIN, and at one point thought I had found it. You can only imagine the let down to see the sellers disclosure and find out it had "structural issues" and essentially will need to be torn down. No Thanks. I did marry a General Contractor, but that is out of our scope.
Jeff and I have spent the last two hours on the computer. We have now officially worked through all of the HUD's, VA's and bank owned properties in Desoto County. So much for a deal. We have now asked for the help of our realtor and are even looking at a few possibilities in surrounding counties. Pretty much everything is some sort of deal in this economy, but considering this house hasn't sold and the "deal" we are cutting with good ole Aunt J leaves us with all of our equity still tied up....we sort of feel like we are starting over. Starting over with hind sight is a hard thing to do. BUT, I can say this, it will all be over SOON and I can't wait. I have no idea where we are going but I couldn't be happier to be doing it.
It is hot as heck! and by the way, 8lbs in 5 weeks. HOW 'BOUT THEM TATERS? HA, sounds like a few too many taters for Kacy. Stress used to make me a size 2. I would get stressed and my family would get all concerned thinking I was anorexic or something. The only 2 in this size is the one in the 12!! (I'm closing in on that one.)
Stella STILL has a cough and she is almost finished with her medication. Ethel smells like ass and Izzy bit the neighbor tonight. I don't blame her. If I was a dog and could have gotten away with it, I would have bit her, too. (I know that seemed to come out of nowhere, but they are all laying on me right now.)
I'm heading to bed early tonight!! It's only 10 after 10. My family, including my husband, is addicted to cartoon shows and I just can't take them anymore. I just started yet another Nicholas Sparks story. This one is The Guardian. I read three others in three days last week. I read Nights in Rodanthe (which was MUCH better than the movie), A Bend in the Road (decent), and Three Weeks With My Brother (my least favorite but very insightful). Oh, and I read that stupid arthritis book. I go through spells of reading. I'll probably quit when we move and it will take me awhile to feel settled enough to sit down and read again. SO, I've got to hurry up and finish this one.
OK, the stuff I cleaned out of my closet is officially for sale. The closet is open. Sizes 2, 4, and 6....Let me know if you want to come shop. It's ALL got to go. I am not moving any of it.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Just a Few Random Thoughts

Can you say exhausted? I'm so overwhelmed, I don't know where to begin, SO lets try a list....
1. We ARE moving! Last we heard this a.m.....I think in 60 days. (That doesn't mean we are happy about it or that it was all the way we wanted it to be, BUT, it will happen.)
2. We are clueless about WHERE we are moving to. We bid on a foreclosure last night and lost it by $2000. That stunk b/c that would have been a huge load off the ole mind.
3. Friday, we survived an F2 Tornado that took out the middle school about 3/4 of mile from our house. We were out back trying to secure patio furniture that was blowing sideways across the backyard straight for the pool when our ears started popping and the water in the pool started lifting out in peaks!! WICKED.
4. The tornado caused a claims nightmare for me at work and lots of overtime.
5. We lost power from about 5 on Friday and didn't get it back until about 4 on Saturday (which only made the claims nightmare even worse.)
6. All of this was going on during Jeff's 20th Year High School Reunion Weekend, so we missed a few things but did make it to the final night. (And had a great time!! It was so good to see so many folks and I couldn't believe how far some people came.....I know some of you guys are reading because you told me you were so leave us a comment sometime PLEASE. We like feedback. Talking to myself all the time gets BORING!)
7. My insurance company DENIED my new proposed treatment plan, so my good ole bow tie wearing doctor that could fit into all of my OLD clothes is appealing that. Maybe by the time I gain another 15 lbs we'll have that one worked out.
8. I started reading a book about RA: The First Year after Diagnosis (or something like that). It was recommended to me by the Enbrel folks, which I have to say are one drug company on top of their game. BUT, now, I'm gonna have to write a book, because that is the biggest bunch of shit I've ever read. (Sorry for my bluntness.) I mean give me a break. Who cares about the etymology of the word Rheumatoid? All I want to know is how to feel better and prevent further joint damage and just exactly how big my ass is going to get? Does it reach a point that it stops growing or can it just keep going forever? I need some fashion assistance...What shoes are cute but have some give for the swelling...NOT, look into SAS shoes! For Goodness Sake, my Grandmother wears them. She rocks the hell out of them, but I'm not going there. There must be a book for the 30 something generation recently diagnosed with RA and apparently it's going to be up to me.
9. My mother has flown the coop. I haven't seen her in two days...Can you say babysitter nightmare? Mother, where are you? I KNOW YOU READ!
10. Jeff can't turn his neck. I didn't even know he knew how to be stressed!
11. Stella (my Yorkie) has an upper respiratory infection that required antibiotics and cough syrup and $85 at the vet.
12. So You Think You Can Dance has started and I LOVE it more than Idol. I get chills watching Idol every now and then. I get them every time on DANCE. Mary Murphy drives me nuts, keep your mute button handy, but you've got to at least try the show. I LOVE IT. I want Mia Michaels' hair. It's cool! Sometimes it's even like a Mohawk. I love the funkiness of it.
13. The Jon and Kate saga is making me want to throw up. I've never been a fan and we've never really watched it, BUT now, SavyG is TiVoing the show. GROSS.
14. Dalton has been very strange lately and extremely moody. HE TAKES AFTER HIS MOM and doesn't do stress well, but it's been even more than that. Puberty?? He's tired and sleeping alot too. It's got me weirded out and worried.
Well there is a quick update of just the few things on the top of my mind. Lord knows we don't need to get too deep there. HA, at least not today.....I'm working hard to maintain my sense of humor....
I've sort of always secretly wanted a tattoo but I've never been able to come with anything I felt was worthy enough to wear for the rest of my life. Today, I came up with something that just might work. I was thinking of having
put right above my butt crack. It could have so many different meanings and it would be out of sight. HUMMM...Now that one, I might do.
Peace Out.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009


Well, today, I woke up on a mission!! (That's what Schitzoembolisms do to you.) While I am back in control, it's still there. Let me just get this out. ARTHRITIS AND the TREATMENT SUCKS ASS! BIG FAT DONKEY BUTTS. It sucks to not feel good so you take the meds and you feel better until the side effects kick in and then your mental capacity is SHOT and you think it may be better to go back to the physical pain. I'm a little freaked tonight about some new "issues" that we are just "watching" for the time being. If anybody out there has ever heard of these issues, I beg you, PLEASE tell me. I've shared before that I had to go see a Neurologist because I was having some short term memory problems. Yes, they are manageable, but a little strange nonetheless. My neurologist believed they were caused by the steroid exposure. They were actually getting noticeably better and even though I've been back taking steroids for about 4 weeks now, I'm just now getting back to the point that I'm having to use writing on my hand as reminders. However, some new things have started in the last 8 to 10 days. From time to time, I've had this kind of dizzy confused feeling. I can shake it really quick and it's been okay but its happening a little more often. Here's the part that's bothering me. Two days ago, I ran into the house with my truck. It dented the bumper but nothing major as far as damage it was just the strange feeling I had when it happened. It was like I wasn't in the truck or something. We have a three car garage with inidividual bays and bricks like columns in between each one. I just pulled up in between doors and hit the bricks.....THEN today, Jeff backed the truck into a parking spot and we switched drivers. I made a comment about why in the middle of a busy gas station parking lot did he have to back in a Suburban? He got out and was getting in his car and I put the truck in reverse and popped the whole rear end up on the sidewalk. LUCKILY, I didn't hit anyone OR the gas station. I obviously thought I was going forward, so I never looked behind me. Hours later, I was getting a pair of PJ pants out of my PJ drawer and slammed my fingers in the drawer. I'm talking about the kind of slammed where SavyG had to open the drawer for me to get my thumb out and now my nail is purple. STRANGE. I just feel out of it and a little spatially impaired.
Last week I was busy decorating every old pair of pants I could find. I found these pics tonight and I like this pair. I wore them in Atlanta and got several compliments!!
They were fun to do.
NOW, the unveiling of today's mission. I did a little BEFORE AND AFTER action for you. I decided that it was time to part with all of the clothes in my closet that no longer fit. I've been holding on to some warped desire for my old body to just miraculously reappear and I think that desire is only making me feel worse. I decided to move all of the clothes in my closet that no longer fit into a guest room closet. That way, if I needed more time to come to grips with getting rid of it, I would have it, but it was a step in the right direction. It was one of the most liberating things I've ever done. When I was diagnosed with RA last September, I was a size 4. I had been a 4 for the last 5 or so years. So you know, whatever size you are, depending on the brand and such, you may go up or down a size. While 90% of my clothes were 4's there were some 2's in there and some 6's. NOW, I'm a 10. You see the problem there. There is no way I will ever be a 2 again. I had no business being a 2 when I was a 2. It's time for it to go. Check this out.

None of that fits me anymore. It makes me sad, but it's time to let it go. I feel like Maverick in Top Gun when he throws Goose's Dog Tags out into the ocean. (I wonder where the hell that came from?)
I was alone doing this most of the day, but Jeff was here when I was moving all of my "cocktail" attire. I got him to snap this picture as an example. I was faced with this all day. I have skirts in there that I LOVE and I used to wear ALL the time and now they only cover ONE butt cheek. This was the top to a pantsuit that I wore to the Homebuilders Christmas Party a couple of years ago. I chose this as an example, because I had to have my mother in law take it up for me so the top would stay up. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? If I tried to put one boob in that thing now, it would bust a seam...

I'm over it. I think I'm gonna check out some consignment stores and see what that looks like. I've got Ann Taylor and Banana Republic Suits coming out of my ears. I can't just give a $400 suit to the GoodWill. I wish I could, but I can't, not to mention, that's a lot of stuff to replace. I need the $$$$. My mother, of course, had to point out that MOST people don't even have what I moved out of my closet and into the guest room. So, I like clothes. You didn't see most of my shoes. I'm not ready to part with those yet. I may not can wear them long, but I can still wear most of them.
Have a great rest of the week. Ours is a little busy. Dalton has TaeKwonDo testing tomorrow night and then Jeff's reunion is this weekend. He bought the whole weekend pass so I guess we are hitting the party scene for the next few days. (I borrowed a dress from my neighbor. THANK YOU MISSY. You are a life saver.)
Peace Out,

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Everyone's HOME

Ok, so I don't know what happened this afternoon, but the fog seemed to lift a little. I think it was just more prayers and "letting go". Boy it's been a rough 10 days or so.....

We went to Atlanta, GA. It was very in we left about 7:30 Friday night. We had spent the day trying to get Jeff's Great Aunt J on the phone and we couldn't. Given all that's been going on and the sudden offer of the exact settlement we had proposed back in February (which at the time they refused) and our not being able to contact her, Jeff was going to get NO rest until he saw her for himself. SOOO, off we went and of course, we aren't going to a town with an amusement park and not pay it a visit. Jeff and Dalton spent the morning with Aunt J which I think she enjoyed and I know it made him feel better. I went to the mall with SavyG. Since she (Aunt J) HATES every fiber of my very existence, we thought that would be best. Then we headed out for the park. Atlanta, by far, has the best coasters of the Six Flags Parks, but I'm pretty sure that will be my last trip there. I just don't think Atlanta is my favorite place. I love the fashion forwardness and the people watching was pretty good, but just the atmosphere on a whole was something I could do without.

My patience has been short and it's been a trying week, but hopefully it will all be over soon. We didn't get pictures from Six Flags this time. I took my camera but the whole trip was so fast, things were just a blur. HOPEFULLY, we are on the road back to some much needed normalcy around here.

(BOY, I've come a long way to get all that out so nicely. HA!!)

Peace Out,

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Its A Better Day

Where in the world are the Acree’s? Today has just been full of twists and turns. If John and Kate can have a reality TV show and get paid a minimum of $27,000 per episode, I’m sure I could do a better job and honestly, I’d do it for less!! (HUMMM, I’m probably meaner and I know I’m more outspoken than Kate….that may NOT be good…..and I’m pretty sure if my husband were tempted by some young spring breakers he’d probably do something he shouldn’t….the difference there would be that I’d probably hold my arms in the air like the officials in a football game and yell, SCORE! And then we’d exchange high fives….I’d just be relieved that he got something somewhere and I didn’t have to be involved.) I don’t know if that makes for good TV or not.

Let me back up, I prayed HARD last night for a better mood and outlook. I’m talking about one of those serious get in the Suburban and drive to Wal-Mart, for a lack of a better place to go at 10 p.m. (Dear Lord, I am thankful for Wal-Marts.) and scream at the top of your lungs, come to Jesus kinda prayers. It must have worked. I still had to work hard at it this morning, but it has definitely improved as the day has gone on. I had to be at the GYNO at 9:40 this morning for my annual tune-up. It’s pretty hard to be excited about your day when you know you have to go in for a tune up and there isn’t anything there to tune up anyway. I told him to dig through the cobwebs and find what he needed to find and let me outta there. We did find that my estrogen was LOW LOW LOW and so I got a shot!! Those usually make me sprout stray eyebrows somewhere on my chin, so at least I have that to look forward to. ANYWAY, I left there and went and had my TB skin test done. They’ll check that on Monday. Ha, since I’m spilling the beans, let me just give you another little “funny”. I had a breast reduction last year. Well, with all the weight I’ve gained I just grew them back. At least they point in the right direction now, but anyway, back to my story, you know the doctor has to check your breasts at your yearly tune up and he said, “Girl, sometimes those things are like starfish, you cut them off and they just grow right back.” Thanks Doc for letting me know, mine didn’t take and I now resemble a sea urchin.

During my tune up, Savannah’s eye doctor called and said her glasses were in. They are too cute, by the way. They made the mistake of calling the house when I didn’t answer my cell and SavyG got the message and proceeded to BLOW my cell up. She filled up my voice mail, so I had to go get her and take her to get her new specs. She’s been complaining off and on of not feeling great, but then when her friends are around she seems to perk up. I haven’t paid it a ton of attention. Last night she was pretty congested and I did give her some good ole Dimetapp. We’ll today, it was down right bad and in the meantime I had gotten word from the Budget Nazi that we may be headed outta town again this weekend. Since it was 1 p.m. on Friday afternoon there was NO way we could get in to see our pediatrician SO we visited the Take Care Clinic at Walgreens. (Dear Lord, We also LOVE Walgreens!) The NP was going through all kinds of questions for Savannah that I was mostly answering anyway and then, IT HAPPENED. She said, “What was the first day of your last period?” As all of the color drained out of my daughter’s face, I knew I had to do something, so I said, “Oh, it was about 6 years ago. OH, did you mean her? She hasn’t had one yet.” I thought we were going to have find get an emisis basin for Savannah. The lady was really nice and said, “I’m sorry honey. I have to ask.” And Savannah said, “Gees, I’m only 9.” It was hysterical and definitely something neither one of us will ever forget!

I’m not at liberty to reveal our very sudden vacation plans just yet. More than likely, I’ll be back tomorrow night. We usually do this surprise thing to the kids, but this one even caught Jeff and I off guard. We didn’t leave the house until just after 7 tonight. We had some business that needed to be tended to and Jeff decided now was as good a time as any and we might as well make a trip of it…so, needless to say, we are on the road again. We hope to arrive just after midnight and at the rate we are going now, we should make it.

AND, OH, OH, I almost forgot, well hell, I almost forgot several things (gotta love the roids) I had LOST 6 pounds since my last doctor visit….STRESS? and I made Dalton a new pair of PJ pants. I finished them this afternoon. He brought them with him to sleep in so I’ll snap some pictures and I made a purse and I took an idea I had gotten in Canton and made a pair of pants for ME. I brought them, too. I’ll share pics tomorrow. OK, “small” hint…potty break in Birmingham. This is turning out to be a really busy month, Dallas TX, ??????Where are we going?, next weekend is Jeffro’s 20 year High School Reunion then we have another court date AND Shake for Jake in Louisiana. WHEW. It’s a good thing I’m on roids or I’d never make it. (Can you believe that came out of this mouth? THE POWER OF PRAYER)

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Constant State of Schizoembolism

Yep, Jeff's favorite word for me freaking completely out has once again entered our vocabularies. I have obviously reached my peak dosage of steroids and it is now affecting everything and everyone around me. I completely lose that filter in my brain called tact when this happens.
This morning when I was walking into the building where my agency is, the groundskeeper, Mr. Calvin was in the hallway painting baseboards. I run into him at least once or twice a week in the mornings as I am getting to work and he is making his morning rounds. Well today was already not going well. I was, of course, running late and when I called to let Tosha know, she had decided to take the day off without really letting me know. That's another story ALL by itself that we just won't get into. So, anyway, here is what went down....
Mr. Calvin: Well good morning Kacy (as he is looking me up and down). I see you are still on your bulk up diet.
Kacy: Mr. Calvin, don't you know fat people F*ck better? (and I just went on up the stairs).
ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Did he really say that to me? Yep he did and I REALLY said that right back. Now, was I wrong for what I said? YEP. Was he wrong for what he said? YEP. Do two wrongs make a right? NOPE. Do I care? NOPE. S-C-H-I-Z-O-E-M-B-O-L-I-S-M!!
Hopefully, by the end of next week, we'll just be off the roids. I go in tomorrow for my TB skin test and the pre-cert work for the medication is under review with my insurance company. They called today with about a million questions.
We received a settlement offer on our court mess after Tuesday. We are still mulling it over and are supposed to meet with our attorney team on Wednesday. That's just added a lot more stress that we could honestly do without, but, HEY, just pile it all on. I've read, that which does not kill us only makes us stronger. If I could get my hands around the person's neck that came up with that, I'd probably break their crack pipe and then I'd kill them myself. If that was the case, I'd be one buff bitch by now but instead I'm just "bulking" up. HA.
I didn't post yesterday, because this mood had set in and I thought it would pass. It didn't, so sorry. I just try to keep it real. I don't guess it's real if I skip the days I'm not feeling all flowery.

Have a great weekend! Peace Out.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Quick to the Point To the Point Note Taken

Court sucked and we didn't get out of there until almost 3. It's all good though. I firmly believe that ALL things happen for a reason and I am at total peace about whatever comes of this fiasco. We return to court on the 17th. I'm too tired to elaborate tonight. Maybe later, or just maybe not.

It's 10:20 and I haven't set down yet today (well, since I got home. I sat on this big butt ALL day on a hard pew in court. They really need me to make them some cushions.) I am literally standing at my kitchen counter typing this now. I have a house FULL of kids spending the night and I am going straight to my bedroom and climbing in bed with about 3 inches of reading material on Enbrel. My FedEx informational packet arrived today about the new drug that is supposed to make it ALL BETTER. (Can you read sarcasm?) HA.

Peace Out,

Monday, June 1, 2009

Reflections of a Long Day

I finally got Jeff to give me the pictures off of his phone. I couldn't bring myself to carry my big camera around the park with me. I wanted to, but I like to ride rides and I'm NOT about to lay my prized possession down for just anybody to pick up and walk off with. SO...above is SavyG with the Princess from the MidEvil Times Show. Savannah thought she was gorgeous! (and she was)
This was my kiddos soaking wet after getting off of AquaMan. We were all drenched. I didn't have a dry place on my body, but considering it was 93 degrees, it was AWESOME.

Savannah found a cool little hat shop and really liked this one. HA.

This was the view from my bench I spent the afternoon on. I forgot to mention it was also right in between a Dippin Dots booth and a Homemade Lemonade Stand. I had it made. Dalton rode this rocket 8 times in a row.

Gotta love Foghorn!

Daffy is my favorite. I made Jeff park in the Daffy Duck section everyday. Since his favorite number is 7, we parked in Daffy Duck 7 both days. We could have parked closer but you gotta stick with the things you love.
YES, I was people watching and even made Jeff entertain me and take a picture of this girls shirt. I LOVE IT. Savannah has one with a sequined and beaded smiley face but this was the first peace sign I saw.
It was a LONG day today. Dalton and Savannah got into a horrible fight first thing this morning while I was getting ready for work. I honestly thought someone was in the den on the far side of the house trying to kill her. I was in my bathroom on the opposite end of the house getting ready when I heard the scariest sound ever coming from far away. I instantly broke into a hot flash and my legs went numb and tingly all at the same time. I had to make them work and took off running for the den. The whole time I was preparing myself for what I might find. I was afraid, the way she had been screaming, that someone had broken into the house and must have a knife to her throat. When I got there, white as a ghost, I found out that Dalton had hit the Info button on the remote to find out how much time was left in her show before he could watch his. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? He didn't even change the channel. I screamed at both of them and made her go get dressed and told her she was coming to work with me. She wasn't happy about it at the time, but I think in the long run she had fun. That was not what I was trying to accomplish. I made Dalton clean his room including out from under his bed and he must have had the fear of God put in him, because he even cleaned out his closet and got all of the clothes that were too small out AND cleaned his game room AND his bathroom. KIDS???!!!!
Did I mention last night that both my kids made Principal's List for the year? I am SO proud.
That little 4 word sentence does not do it justice.
Today, on my way to work, I had all but decided it was time to quit my job. I needed to spend more time at home with my kids and my family. After working all day and thinking more and more about it and enjoying my work, I think tonight I am realizing that my kids are growing up and they don't need me, I need them. I have been in this ongoing internal battle with myself about them and about me, too and what makes me happy and what is best for them. I still don't have it all figured out, but am thinking about trying to split the difference for awhile and see if it helps. I'm thinking about going to a "3 Day Work Week". I work everyday. I don't have to be in the office to be working. When you own your own business you are always working. Everything you do, in some way or somehow feeds back into your business and your mind is always working or thinking about what can be done to drive your bottom line. I am fully set up at home to work from here, but I wonder if allowing myself the "mental" break would least through the summer. I don't like leaving the kids everyday and there being so much time while I'm away for them to veg out or learn things I don't want them learning. They are going to VBS next week. That will keep them occupied for a bit and give me more time to think about all of this. I need to talk it over with Jeff, too. He's always pretty supportive, but we haven't had the time today and we've both had a lot on our minds.
Tomorrow morning at 9 we have to be in court for a hearing about the mess with Aunt J. We filed a counter suit last month against all parties involved and they made a motion to have our counter suit thrown out. We found that out the day we left for vacation. Needless to say, we both left feeling like we were going to throw up, but we've been told by numerous people who know the legal system much better than we do, that this is more than likely a ridiculous formality. After all, they can't stop us from filing suit. We may have to just sue instead of counter sue but that one way or another it would be admitted. At least that's what our legal team tells us. SO, it's off to court we go. I doubt either of us will sleep well tonight. We are just still praying for an end to the mess. We don't even care what the outcome is anymore...sell the house or don't sell the house. Just be done with it and STOP costing us every extra dime we make. We are so ready to feel like we are living our lives again instead of living this holding pattern we've been living for the last year. It is hard on both of us in different ways. Most of the time I would say it is harder on Jeff than it is on me, but I think he would say it's harder on me.
I've decided that one of my new pet peeves is that Blogger puts your post time as the time you start your post not the time you finish it. I think it should be the other way around. Some of those longs ones with lots of pictures take hours. Just something else I was thinking about.
Are you watching So You Think You Can Dance? It's one of my favorites!!! It only comes on this time every year which is NO good because I have to wait a long time between seasons, but I love the show. It gives me chill bumps. I've been catching up on it from when we were out of town.
SavyG is spending the night down the street with some friends and going to their VBS tomorrow. Hope she makes it through the night. She doesn't always. I'm gonna try to catch some ZZZ's.