Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Every Day Life

Jeff is mad at me right now, because I won't get up and make tarter sauce to go with the healthy fish sticks we are having for dinner. Whatever Jeff....I'm sure I've done worse. Why do men ask you to do something the moment you sit down to do something you want to do? One of life's little mysteries, I guess. Just like the rest of our lives, I'm pretty sure fighting over tarter sauce is enough to land us a guest appearance on Springer. Oh well, I always say, fight fire with fire....

Would you check out the hair growing out of that man's ear? Where the hell did that come from? He didn't have that back when I said I do. For some reason, he won't let me trim it. He said he just doesn't think he can handle me near his ears with those little trimmer scissors. I think it's because last time I tried to help him with nose hairs, he ended up bleeding. I was just trying to help. Dude, one of them was so long it was growing out of one nostril and curling up into the other one. Obviously, there comes a time in life where you HAVE to depend on the magnifying mirror. Jeff, it's that time. (And, if you'd leave me alone about tarter sauce, we wouldn't have to have these little talks.)

While we are being gross, check this out...

My toenail grew back. It only took 15 months! I ran the 1/2 Marathon for St. Jude in 2007. I lost 3 toenails! THAT'S DISGUSTING! The worst one was this BIG toe. The other two little ones grew back in a couple of months but that big one took forever. That is all mine now. If you know me well, you realize how important this was to me. I take foot hygiene very serious. I go so far as to make sure that my friends, family and co-workers feet stay in good health and presentable.

Here is my Izzy!

All of my love right now to the Ash family and the loss of their beloved pooch Buddy this week. I am so terribly sorry! You all know I love you and are certainly in my thoughts and prayers right now.
We missed Biggest Loser last night because of TiVo issues! I called and complained though and got a credit on my account and 3 free months of Showtime! They said they knew they were having issues. What a great trade off....I can't watch my shows unless I go Old School and pull out the VCR and video tapes, but Jeff gets all the skin flicks he can handle for the next 3 months. I'm just gonna tell you right now, that is unacceptable. They need to get their mess straight. I don't have time to be playing games with my reality television. If they had a problem during American Idol, we would have really had some issues.

Speaking of Idol, what's up with Alexis Grace going home? Insane!

We are officially a Real Estate Agents nightmare. First of all, we have 3 dogs that I refuse to lock up. They are all friendly and Izzy is scared of everybody and runs outside and hides if someone she doesn't know comes over. They can deal or they can just not look at the house. I personally don't care. A couple of other things that seem to cause him a problem (the sign is in the yard now).....

This is Rascal Flats. He is the gremlin (guinea pig) that lives in the hearth room connected to the kitchen. I actually moved him when we listed the house from living on the kitchen counter to the hearth room. He likes to interact with us. What was I supposed to do with him?

The Christmas cards with pictures still hanging on my fridge REALLY makes the Realtor nuts. Sorry Dude. They are my friends and family and it still happens to be my fridge and I happen to like pictures. I'm just not ready to take them down.

Give me some credit, at least my toilets are clean.

So, SavyG and I had a little talk on Sunday. I felt like it was a really interesting talk, considering I had it with my 9 year old and all. It sort of left me speechless. The best way I know is to just give you a play by play...
(We were driving down the road in Myrtle, by the way, that has no radio and neither of us can sing very well, so I was looking for conversation topics.)

Kacy: So what do you want to be when you grow up Savannah?
Savannah: A doctor. Dad told me I should be a Proctologist! Do you know what that is?
Kacy: Ummm, that's a butt doctor.
Savannah: Yep. I haven't ruled that out, yet. There is no way I can be a Podiatrist. Feet just totally gross me out. Oh and va-jay-jays just aren't my thing. I don't think I could be a Gynecologist. Just think about everything that can go wrong with a va-jay-jay. Maybe I'll just be a Pediatrician.
Kacy: That's probably a good idea. I'm glad to hear you've really thought this through. Do you like kids?
Savannah: Not really.
Kacy: When is your next soccer game?
I still think it would be a good idea to have her put to sleep. I don't even want to think about what our future conversations will look like. I mean my son's biggest problem is that he got a C on his vocabulary test and if he doesn't bring his words home to study this week, he's grounded. My daughter is worried about all of the things that can possibly go wrong with the female anatomy. (I was secretly glad to hear that va-jay-jays weren't her thing.)

Pray for me.



Missy said...

Okay my 16 yr old just asked me what I was roaring about. I had to tell her or read her your convo with Savy G. Good Lord that might have put me over the top. But ya know it reminded me of a conversation that my oldest and I had a few years back...I think I will blog about that tonight,thanks for the thought. Now you will have to go and read my blog to see what I am talking about.
I think I might of made the tartar sauce but used something in place of the plain yogurt, diaper cream (yes I am awful), something that would keep him from ever asking me to make it again. I tell my husband "You got two legs, two hands don't ya? Go make it yaself!!!" Damn men....I tell my husband all the time I see why women are lesbians, its much easier.
Well I am going to go blog thanks to you...meanwhile I am still lauging at your convo with Savy G...funny stuff

Missy said...

Hey girl, did dh stuff you in a closet somewhere?? lol. All because tartar sauce lol.
Hope you are doing good, having a wonderful weekend. It's raining and going to turn to snow tonight. WTH, we were in shorts last week and we are going to get several inches of snow tonight..ugh