Friday, January 23, 2009


If at first you don't succeed, TRY AGAIN. I sat down to blog last night and got one sentence into it and realized it just wasn't going to happen. Yesterday, was just a BAD day! I try to stay positive, but yesterday kicked my ass. That pretty much happens every time you are required to sit in an attorneys office for hours and defend yourself against horrible accusations. That is pretty much what the situation with Jeff's Great Aunt has turned into. It is just a huge MESS. I can say it is a mess that we will never get into again. I guess the positive is the education on caring for the elderly that we are receiving.

I started to blog yesterday and I didn't know where to start. I was starting with Savannah because she was standing next to me arguing with me about going to get in the shower. That's a normal argument these days. What made that particular argument interesting is that I could SMELL her and it was not a pleasant smell. I can't figure these kids out. I'd say about half the time, they get out of the shower smelling worse than they did when they got in. That's what happens when you sprinkle water on a hot mess. They just really stink. Puberty?

I'm no longer tracking my diet. Yep, that worked for a week. I actually lost 4 pounds. I'm told that's good. I didn't think so. I'm more of an instant gratification kind of girl. I've had a head cold this week. If I take an Alka-Seltzer Cold, I can breathe in about 30 minutes. A whole week for 4 little pounds that you couldn't see just didn't do it for me. I know it should, but it didn't.

Right now, all of my focus has been shifted. My MTX has me screwed up. I take that shot now on Thursdays. It makes me sick at my stomach and gives me a horrible taste in my mouth. The worst part about it is my short term memory. Well, I think that's the worst part. I guess it depends on who you talk to about it. Yesterday, Jeff was yelling mean things at me and made me cry. I got up and walked out of the room, knowing that he was frustrated about the whole day, not necessarily at me. When I got back in the room to tell him how that made me feel, I couldn't remember what he said. All I could remember was that it was mean. It's pretty freaky. I know that little story is funny, but most of the time it is frustrating.

I actually watched some of Oprah yesterday. I don't like Oprah. I stopped liking her years ago and have refused to watch her since. Yesterday, I couldn't remember WHY I quit watching her all those years ago so I paid attention. They were talking about bioidentical hormones. I have had a lot of trouble with my hormones and found this particular topic very interesting. I even wrote it down so I could remember to do my research. I had a hysterectomy, but I don't remember when....several years ago....I'm thinking five years ago. My hormones, which seem to be the driving factor behing everything, are NUTS and they make me nuts. I've gotten to where I recognize when they are really bad, but the everyday little fluctations usually get swept under the rug until the rug jumps up and levitates across the room at someones throat. Dude, I hate those days. Right now, I don't know if the rug is about to levitate or if I'm just so stressed out it's normal to feel this way. HUMMM...Oh and I think I quit watching Oprah when she said that Hurricane Katrina was a racist act of God. That's it. All last night when I was trying to figure it out, I kept thinking it had to do with 9/11. It wasn't. It was Katrina. Now, I can't watch her again. See how this memory thing is. It's WEIRD. Yesterday, I was so frustrated and felt so bad, I was thinking about just quitting the medicine altogether. I just want my old life back. I think it's gone now. I didn't enjoy it enough when I had it.

Dalton has a basketball game in the morning. I promise to take pictures. It's another one of those 8 a.m. games. We videoed the last game and I'm not savvy enough to figure out the video blogging yet. If I find the free time I seem to have misplaced, I'll work on that.

I have to pay another visit to the attorneys office and pick up paperwork we need for next week and then I'm off to the office.
Have a wonderful weekend.

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